Most leaders I work with care deeply about the people around them. They just get busy. And somewhere in the busyness, the people who matter most start to feel like they can wait.
Think about the people who make your work possible. Not just your clients or customers, but the colleagues who cover for you, the direct reports who execute your vision, the stakeholders whose support opens doors. Now ask yourself honestly: do you treat them like they matter, or like they can wait?
Two recent experiences brought this into sharp focus for me.
I’ve been a paying customer of one organization for four months. The first month brought minor friction. Then a bigger issue surfaced. After six weeks of trying to resolve it on my own, I escalated to the president of the small company. I received a prompt reply: “I’ll look into it.” No apology, but at least an acknowledgment. Two weeks later, I followed up. Nothing. Another few weeks passed. I’ve stopped chasing them, and I’ve stopped doing business with them.
Contrast that with a second organization. I received an automated renewal notice from Erik in Customer Success at Circle. Tucked into that email was a simple line: “How are things going in your community? If you’d like to discuss your subscription, just reply to this email.” So I did. I shared some concerns and asked whether someone might help me think through how to better serve The Swarm
. Erik responded quickly and offered to meet with me personally.
I’ve chosen not to name the first organization or the people involved. I’m happy to name Erik and his company anytime someone asks.
The annual spend with both is roughly the same. One understands what the other doesn’t: retention is built in the small moments. A genuine question. A timely response. The willingness to show up when it matters.
Now bring this back to your own world. Think about the people around you whose engagement, trust, and goodwill you depend on. Your direct reports. Your peers. Your key stakeholders.
Are you the leader who responds promptly when someone raises a concern, or do you go quiet and hope it resolves itself? When a team member flags burnout, do you follow up a week later, or does the conversation get absorbed into the noise of everything else? When a colleague goes out of their way to support you, do you acknowledge it, or do you move on to the next thing? When was the last time you asked a stakeholder how things were really going, and then genuinely listened to the answer?
It’s the slow erosion of trust that happens when people feel like they don’t quite matter enough to warrant your full attention. If the people closest to your work were asked today whether they feel seen, supported, and valued by you, what would they say? And if you’re not sure of the answer, what’s one step you can take this week to find out?